So have you heard of this term, “trophy kids?” It refers to the recent generation of kids that get trophies just for participating (I did NOT get a trophy for driving to work on icy streets this morning, I’m just sayin’). Apparently the point is that it builds self-esteem, so every kid feels important, whether they win or not. There are those that agree with this and, obviously, those that don’t. Those that oppose the mind-set claim it builds self-esteem, but turns children into self-indulgent young adults that feel like they “deserve” opportunities. I can only imagine what the “Tiger Mom” thinks of this.
I’m not even sure I have an opinion about this (hard to believe, I know). Building self-esteem is good, yadda, yadda. Creating a generation of spoiled whiners is bad, blah, blah. Anyway, so what was my point?
Oh yeah. So, we have worked for months on shaping Connor’s positive behavior, while trying to eliminate the negative behavior which, for him, is all related to social skills deficits (hitting, pushing, etc.). These behaviors always occur at school, not at home, so they work on it as well. At home we have a prize box, and good school reports earns a prize from the box. It was all fine and dandy, until recently, when he announced, “these prizes aren’t cool.” What?! Since when are matchbox cars and play-doh not cool?
One day he announces,”I want a trophy.” How does a five-year-old even know what a trophy is? But okay, he’s telling me what he’ll work for, so I tell him he needs three straight days of good behavior at school. I’ll be damned, it worked. So I had to scramble to find a trophy. They’re not as easy to find as you would think. BUT, they are surprisingly inexpensive at actual trophy shops! Who knew?
I’m hoping that, in the near future, I won’t be building a massive trophy case to house his collection of “Good Job” and “Superstar” trophies. I’m not TRYING to create a trophy kid, just a kid with functional social skills.