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Hater Humpday #3

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Welcome to Hater Humpday, a weekly theme created by Dawn at This Side of Typical.  And now a week’s worth of pent-up angst and venom shall come spewing forth, like a Gallagher show.

 

 


 

1.  I hate that my son’s older friend told him all about Justin Bieber

The zombie apocalypse begins with Bieber.

when they were in the car together on the way to Dallas.  He tells me how Justin Bieber is the best singer IN THE WHOLE WORLD, and Justin Bieber loves to sing and he’s really, really, REALLY good.  He doesn’t even know who Bieber is, because he saw a long-haired rocker dude the other day, and said “hey, he looks like Justin Bieber”, even though he is clearly the anti-Bieber.  Every time he starts his Bieber tribute I start doing the nervous junkie neck-scratch.  I’m convinced that every time he mentions Bieber, Bono sprouts another gray goatee hair.

2.  I hate myself for teaching my kid the “Guess what?  Chicken butt!!!!” joke.  One can only imagine what I must have been thinking the day I thought that was a good idea.  On the way to summer camp this morning, ten times.  Last night after dinner, fifteen times.  He doesn’t get that you’re supposed to surprise someone when you do it.

3.  People with special orders.  Out of courtesy to the rest of us that are in a hurry and, thus, eating crappy fast food, can’t you just pick the goddamn pickle off the Big Mac yourself??

4.  I hate that Joe Q. Workerbee has to shoulder the burden for a company’s success or failure, like when the supervisor boss-man has a meeting to tell people that they need to increase their production, take fewer breaks, increase their numbers.  This happened to my friend this week, and it’s infuriating.  Numbers can be down because of the economy, trade issues with China, war, or some political issue in some corner of the world that we have nothing to do with.  Why should the downtrodden, who are trying to scrape by in their meager existence, be made to feel bad because they spent 3 minutes talking to a co-worker about the last episode of The Voice???  Suck it, middle manager pariah, suck IT.

5.  Hackers that send viruses to your computer that causes your email account to send an email to everyone in your contact list with a link to some crazy, bullshit website.  If you got an email from me, and it has a link to some site, it’s not from me.  Sorry about that.

Have a great, Bieber-free, rest of the week.

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About Flannery

Kid, husband, dogs, my mother, full-time job, maximum stress, minimal relaxation...sooner or later I had to vent. AND we moved from California to Texas. I could start a whole other blog about that.

11 responses »

  1. I am SO thankful that neither of my daughters are Beiber fans. We are a Beiber free household.

    Reply
  2. fuckin’ Beiber. My son got an invitation to a Beiber themed party and i refused to go just on priniciple.

    Reply
  3. #3. Oh, yes. #3. In the rare instances where I’ve missed eating something at home and know I won’t be able to make it to the office without something in my system, I’ll occasionally pull into a Mickey D’s for their sole vegan breakfast fare. About a month ago, I got stuck behind a lady who took twelve minutes (yes, I timed it) getting her breakfast. Do you suppose the folks honking behind her spurred her to hurry? Nope. I had to agree with the cashier when she said, “If your order is going to take 12 minutes, you probably do not need to be eating fast food.”

    #4 is another yes, yes, yes from here. That’s not to say I disagree with the others, of course, but these two strike me harder at this exact moment.

    Reply
  4. You know what, I CAN’T pick that pickle off. If I do, then my hands get all mustardy and that special sauce crap gets all over the place. Ewww!

    And I just know you’re working on perfecting that Beiber hair flip. Don’t deny it.

    Reply
  5. Was the victim of #4 your friend Christine?? If so, I take offense at this because conceiving the idea of Chick-Fil-B is nothing short of corporate genius.

    Reply
  6. Ah! I totally forgot about chicken butt. Swear had you not mentioned it, I’d be in the same situation in six months. Of course, there’s still a good chance cause I am totally my worst enemy.

    And, as annoying as special orders are, just dream about what they’re rubbing that Big Mac bun on in the back. I got your special sauce right here! Sometimes it helps, sometimes not.

    Reply
  7. My daughter likes Justin Bieber. I think. Actually, I haven’t looked too deeply into the matter, but I mentioned him once, and she didn’t say anything nasty in reply, and I took that as a bad sign. Past that, I really don’t want to know.

    Denial can be sweet.

    Reply
  8. I love “guess what chicken butt”- No LIE, Chicken THIGH…. (I had to.)

    Reply
  9. There is always someone ahead of me in that drive thru line that either wants to pay in pennies or can’t read the menu and doesn’t know what they want! I completely relate to this one.

    We have no Bieber issues – I have no idea what the kid even sounds like – lucky I guess!

    I’m with you on that middle manager…and since when do you think you have to apologize cuz someone else hacked your email? Sheesh – you’re losing your touch – we need to go find them and kick their chicken butts! 😉

    Reply
  10. awww..poor Bieber. I totally tried to convince my boy to go see the movie….ya know, just to give me an excuse to see it….he gave me a firm “No!” on that request.

    Reply
  11. Oooh, I *love* the new look!! (Sorry, I’ve been out of the loop for a while!) And yeah, #3, 4 and 5?? Totally with you!!

    I’ve never heard Bieber, but I like to make fun of the Bubs when he has freshly washed hair and tell him he’s got the Bieber hairstyle…

    Reply

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